Debunking Housewife Stereotypes: You Don’t Have to be Submissive to be a Housewife

It is not a surprise that the idea of being a housewife is something that is rejected by many women in 21st Century America, especially when housewives are stereotyped as being submissive. 

When I do a Google search for ‘submissive definition’ this is what comes up: 

Ready to conform to the authority or will of others; meekly obedient or passive. 

I appreciate that being submissive is also a personal preference where someone is dominant and someone is submissive for the sake of eroticism, but that is not what I am writing about. 

Now, while I love my husband and want to do my best to take care of him and our home, I absolutely do not ‘conform to his authority or will’ nor am I ‘meekly obedient or passive.’ Likewise, I do not argue with my husband over every little issue just to prove that I am not submissive.  

Being a wife is not a lesser position, neither is being a housewife. 

I am my husband’s partner, and I am in control of my home. However, I do not control my husband; he is his own person and does not expect me to be submissive when it comes to our partnership; he likes that I have a will and a mind of my own. 

While we respect each other as individuals and know that we each have our own minds, we also respect our legally-binding partnership; we understand that with marriage comes responsibility and accountability to each other.

We both have to consider what is best for each other and our marriage; it is not about being submissive and letting my husband make all the decisions that impact both of us; it is about working together and doing what is best for our union.

Personally, I would be wary of any man who wants a wife to be ‘meekly obedient or passive.’ I would not want a husband who is like that, so it makes me question why a man would want that or find that attractive in a woman -- unless it is to take advantage of his position over her.

Even though there are women who enjoy being submissive and want a husband to rule over them, that is not the case for all women and it shouldn't be assumed that all housewives are the submissive type; it is certainly not the case for me. 

Maybe if more women knew that they could be smart, empowered housewives, rather than a ‘meekly obedient’ submissive housewife, they would be more willing to be a housewife for a husband they love.

What housewife stereotypes do you disagree with?

Share your thoughts in the comments!